The holiday season is a time full of family gatherings, traditions, and excitement. However, it can also be overwhelming for autistic children who may experience sensory sensitivities, anxiety around change, or difficulty with transitions. With a bit of preparation and flexibility, you can create an inclusive holiday experience that is positive and safe for your child. Below are practical tips to help you prepare for the holidays.
Set Expectations Early
Changes to routine can be difficult for children with autism and setting expectations in advance is critical. Start by communicating to your child about the upcoming holiday events. This communication can take different forms depending on what works best for your child. Examples include visual schedules or social stories that outline what your child can expect before and during the holidays, such as decorating the house, visiting family members, and eating meals at unusual times.
If your child is sensitive to surprises, knowing what is coming can be reassuring. Give them as much detail as possible and explain or show them what they might see, hear, or experience during a holiday event. This might mean “practice runs” of the activities, showing photos of places, or going to locations of planned activities to give your child familiarity before the actual event occurs.
Create a Sensory-Friendly Environment
Many holiday activities involve loud noises, strong smells, and bright lights which can be overwhelming for autistic children. To help your child feel more comfortable, consider these tips:
- Choose lights that aren’t too bright or blinking and avoid decorations with strong smells.
- Designate a quiet space where your child can retreat when things become too overwhelming. Equip this space with comfort items, like noise-canceling headphones, weighted blankets, or fidget toys.
- Holiday outfits can sometimes be uncomfortable for children with tactile sensitivities. Allow your child to wear comfortable clothes that they prefer.
When your child feels more in control of their sensory environment, they are more likely to stay calm and engaged in holiday activities.
Stick to Your Routine As Much As Possible
Holidays often mean later bedtimes, skipped naps, or meals at unusual times, which can be challenging for children who rely on routine. Try to maintain regular schedules for sleeping and eating as much as possible. For example, if a holiday meal will be served late, consider giving your child a snack at their usual mealtime to prevent hunger-induced meltdowns.
If sticking to your exact routine isn’t possible, prepare your child in advance. Using a visual schedule regularly, in which all potential activities are included, can help. You can rearrange the order of activities, but your child will still be able to see that the expected activities will happen.
Plan Sensory-Friendly Holiday Activities
Adapt holiday traditions to fit your child’s needs, creating activities that are sensory-friendly and enjoyable for everyone. For instance:
- Create homemade decorations to give your child a chance to get involved in the decorating process in a way that is hands-on and creative.
- Choose instrumental or gentle holiday music over loud, fast-paced tunes that can play in the background during quieter moments.
- For children who enjoy being outdoors, take a winter walk to see holiday lights or go on a “holiday scavenger hunt” where they search for specific decorations in the neighborhood.
Planning these activities allows your child to be a part of the holidays in ways that feel comfortable and manageable.
Prepare Your Family and Friends
Explain your child’s needs to extended family or friends who will be a part of your holiday celebrations. Talk to them about your child’s potential triggers or sensory sensitivities and strategies you’re using to help your child manage the excitement and changes of the season.
If your child struggles with social interactions, let family members know so they are prepared and can adjust their expectations. Many autistic children benefit from having boundaries respected and knowing that they don’t have to participate in every activity or greet every person.
Prepare for Challenges
Despite your best efforts, there may still be moments when your child feels overwhelmed. Have a plan in place for how you’ll handle difficult situations. This might include stepping outside for fresh air, using a calming technique like deep breathing, or simply letting your child retreat to their quiet space.
Remember that meltdowns or other challenging behaviors are often not a reflection of your child misbehaving but rather a response to unanticipated changes, sensory overstimulation, or non-preferred activities. Approach these moments with empathy and understanding, helping your child to regain control and feel safe.
Focus on What Matters Most
The holidays are often filled with pressure to attend every event or follow every tradition. The best approach for families with autistic children is to focus on what matters most: Spending time together in a way that feels positive and meaningful. It’s okay to say no or skip parts of traditions that don’t work for your family.
Every family’s holiday experience is unique, and this is especially true for families with children with special needs. Embrace the moments of joy! When the focus is on connection and comfort, you’ll find that the season is just as magical as it’s meant to be.
